Acts: a horror comedy, etc.

[sistawendy]

Remember how my train to Portland took two hours longer than it was supposed to? I put that two hours to good (?) use and finished Acts Of the Apostles. And I took notes, baybee.

Horror
Acts 13:6-12 - Paul blinds a guy using, basically, the Force.

Acts 19 approvingly describes the burning of books about magic, and describes how much they were worth. They'd be priceless today.

Horror comedy
Acts 16:16-24 - Out of annoyance Paul exorcises a demon out of a slave with a “prophetic spirit”. Her owners get mad and have Paul arrested and beaten.

Comedy
Acts 8:26-40 - The Ethiopian eunuch apparently can’t understand what he’s reading aloud?!

Acts 14:8-18 - There's a hilarious culture clash at Iconium (modern Konya). Pagans offer sacrifices to Paul & Barnabas, calling them Hermes & Zeus, respectively.

The comedy of poor editing: starting around Acts 16, the narration switches back and forth between third-person singular and first-person plural.

Also in acts 19, freelance non-Christians invoke Jesus while attempting an exorcism, but the demon beats their butts.

It was funny to me when in Acts 17, Paul visits Athens, long the cultural capital of the Greek world by then, and has an unusually civilized chat with Stoics and Epicureans. The Athenians scoff at Paul, but they don't persecute him. That's how the rest of you ancients should have handled the Christians, you muppets. But neau, you Saducees, Pharisees, and Romans had to get your undies in a bunch.

Acts 26:29:

Paul replied, "Whether quickly or not, I pray to God that not only you but also all who are listening to me today might become such as I am – except for these chains."

If wise guys have a patron saint, I think Paul should be it.

Drama
Acts 15:36-41 has internal dissension! Paul told Barnabas didn’t trust “John called Mark”, saying he bailed on them when they were in trouble, so Paul split up with Barnabas.

History
Acts 10:9-16 - Peter’s vision reads at first like an argument against kashrut, i.e. Jewish dietary laws. But no! It’s in favor of internationalism! Sure enough, in Acts 10:28-33 Peter preaches to Cornelius, a “centurion of the Italian Cohort”! It's striking how often throughout the New Testament the Roman military doesn't act very military.

Acts 15:1-21 - Paul wins the argument about circumcision. Yeah, maybe he didn't really, but by not getting killed as soon as his opponents in this matter, he won for any practical purpose.

Acts 24:26-27 - Paul accuses Governor Felix of expecting a bribe from Paul and leaving him in prison when Felix's term ended as a “favor to the Jews”. Mostly, though, Acts is much kinder to the Romans than the Gospels. That's a sad irony considering that – wait for it – the Romans executed him.

Acts 16:35-37 - We find out about the perks of Roman citizenship. Paul claims to have been born a citizen in Acts, but modern scholars dispute that. In Acts 22:25 citizenship gets Paul out of a flogging; no kinkster he.

Fave rave
Acts 20:35 - Paul says, "[...] We must support the weak."

In some ways, Paul was, or is at least portrayed as, yuckier than Jesus. It's hard to imagine Jesus blinding somebody. On the other hand, Paul wasn't outright nasty to people who were close to him.

Comments

[staxxy]

Paul is, indeed, yuckier than Jesus. And generally more I dunno, uppity maybe? He is certainly more judgmental and mouthy. I mean, good on him for sticking by his beliefs but WOW the assholery.

[sistawendy]

He’s awfully sure of himself. That’s what makes a monster.

[staxxy]

it certainly doesn't HELP someone not be a monster. But there are lots of people who are sure of themselves who use their powers for awesome instead of destruction. I just wish there were more people who build than those who destroy in power right now.