Is she or isn't she? An overabundance of caution.

[sistawendy]

So I've been asking girlfriends in person and online if the incident on the 4th was flirting. The response has been unanimous in the affirmative, from over a dozen women, most of whom are queer.

Yes, of course that occurred to me while it was happening. But she's significantly younger & prettier, and to all appearances cisgender and even straight. I just couldn't make myself believe it. What does that say about me? Something not very good, probably. Lower-than-warranted self-esteem, rejection fatigue, or general trans-related wariness stemming from an acute awareness of my prodigious capacity to freak people out? Take your pick.

Oh yeah: I had a beach date to get to, but I didn't mention that on my way out the door. I was just too flustered.

Comments

[m-cobweb.livejournal.com]

I dunno, she bought your drink and told you where she lives, which are not common things in random encounters.

[randomdreams.livejournal.com]

Could also be a healthy sense of erring on the side of presuming less interest, rather than more, coz the latter can be obnoxious when it's unwelcome.

[leenerella]

Haha! You may be overthinking it!

She made an overture, whether she's straight or not. She could still have introduced herself and shook your hand in an effort to get to know her neighbors, but buying you a drink was unnecessary for that.

Blah blah blah, I think you should look for her. If nothing else, you can buy the coffee, and you'll probably have all of your other questions answered in short order. :)

Also, check the missed connections and see if she's looking for you! The Stranger and Craigslist still has those, right?

[sistawendy.livejournal.com]

Believe me, I'm already working the Stranger. And I've been wearing down the sidewalk between my place & 80th.

accept the compliment.....

[maellenkleth]

Yahh, she's flirting. By all accounts you're a nice person, you're not nasty, and you show well (in photographs at least) plus you have oddball fashion sense. Adds up to 'flirtable' in my books.

[ivy]

Unlike most other commenters, I kinda deem it unknowable. It exists in an uncollapsed waveform; she totally could have been, but those signals are not things that we act binarily about. So I'd probably be hanging out in that coffee shop hoping for another similar encounter, in your shoes, but I don't think you have enough information to pass judgment yet. Here's hoping you run into her for more data gathering! [grin]

[sistawendy.livejournal.com]

I'd probably be hanging out in that coffee shop hoping for another similar encounter

I'm one step ahead of you. ;)