Maura's Illuminated Manuscript

I had Juneteenth off. I didn't find that out until after my alarm went off this morning and I added my employer's holiday calendar on my phone. I salvaged the morning, however, by going right back to sleep.

And how did I spend this unexpected day off? By committing ritual commercial suicide: I have told my IP lawyers to forget it and published my sex toy design at github.com/sistawendy/sextoy as open hardware. Sure, anybody can use that design to make those toys and sell them, but they can't try to prevent anyone else from doing so. I included instructions on how to get the things made.

Why did I do this?

1. I'm really convinced that there isn't a market for them. Even my most enthusiastic market research subject isn't as enthusiastic as I am. Remember, that's a fairly freaky self-selected group I'm talking about.
2. Even if I thought there were a market, do I really want the hassle and expense? Not really. I just wanted a toy that works, and I want other people to have one too, preferably at a price we can all afford.

You know that thing I do whereby I wake up ungodly early, pee, and then can't get back to sleep until way too late if at all? I've done that at least three times this week. I can't remember too precisely because lack of sleep fries my memory. The way I got enough sleep last night was 1930-0100 and then 0400-0600.

What did I do with those intervening three hours? Well, I got something back from the 3D print shop. It works a treat. Ahem. I'm not absolutely 100% satisfied with the esthetics myself, but I've already committed to giving a copy of this revision to my best source of feedback. She's picking it up on Sunday. And I'll be able to show it to the Tickler on Saturday.

Lest you mistake my silence about my sex toy design for abandonment of the project, I got my (ungh) third iteration on the design after the market research in the mail two days ago. I tried it last night, and it's the best yet. There are still a few artifacts in the design that need to be removed, but I'm up to the task. CAD/CAM is hard. Let's go shopping painstakingly edit the mesh.

The design suggestions that I ran with? Came from one person. She suggested better ergonomics in the handled and either a bulb or a recurve at the insertion point. I took all of those suggestions. I'm considering offering her another prototype once I get my super slick one ready.

Then I have to do the fact sheet, etc. Then I have to contact the lawyers about the patent; last week they reached out to remind me of deadlines. Oy. I'm wondering if I really want to try and build a sex toy empire. I care way less about making money than I do getting the toy into the hands of people who need it.

Latex dinner last night. People in rubber are always nice to look at, and meeting more kinky freaks is never a bad idea for me. I wasn't really feeling it, though, because

1. it was so crowded that I was wedged into a seat that was very awkward to leave to talk to more people, and
2. I wasn't quite over my accursed cold. And yes, it's an accursed cold.

I've spent the last few days preparing for the coming of the Tickler. That and what I hope to be the last round of sex toy deliveries shall be my weekend.

I had my first nightmare about being in danger because I'm trans. Fuck the fash.

Sex toys mailed: 2
Number of address labels smeared: 1
Pretty young strangers who chatted me up at the Wildrose: 1
Sex toys delivered in person: 1
Drinks bought for me by the requester of the toy, namely Shiny H: 3. Or was it 4?
Simultaneously visible trans boobs later that night: 4, definitely
Naughty business: 0
Hours slept: 6
Dried figs consumed: 3
Cups of coffee consumed: 2
Souflees consumed: 1.05. The first one wasn't quite done.
Number of people in G's car as she drove me home: 5, including 2 children

I had meant to go grocery shopping and clean house last night, but instead I spent over two hours on Zoom talking to Lady Katherine, that champion of chat. We talked sex toys, dating, and (ahem) related activities because she's an expert, and let's face it, I could use expert help in all those areas. Je ne regrette rien.

And I got the grocery shopping done this morning because it was too wet to ride Miss Indigo.

Well, first I ran out of copies of Zelda III aside from the one I use. Then I had Shiny H offering to buy a copy when I offered them for free, out of the goodness of her freaky little heart. She said I didn't need to order unless somebody else wanted one too.

That just happened this afternoon: one cis woman asking for one on behalf of another one. I have placed an order for two more, which gets me a price break from the 3-D print shop. To quote my father, will wonders never cease? I mean, this is good news. I was worried about crickets, and they're totally not happening.

Meanwhile, I've ascertained that I have everything I need to do my taxes, including my mortgage interest tax deduction. I just learned that the Trump tax scam screwed me out of 17% of that deduction, as if I didn't have enough reasons to hate him. I'm so not doing my taxes tonight, though: too tired.

I bopped around the south end yesterday afternoon delivering three of the four copies of Zelda III that I had ready at hand: one to Temptress, who's dating another trans woman, and two to other trans women. So! That's going better than expected.

During that second delivery, the trans woman's housemate, who was dressed as a normie, complimented my Evil Princess coat and outed herself as a goth. She knows cupcake_goth, natch, because everyone does.

One sex therapist has expressed interest in my final design, and wants a fact sheet and a link to an e-commerce site. I assume that what goes into the fact sheet is something like what I put in my big call to action, but I should look at an example.

While I was literally in the neighborhood, I got Ex to sign my car title, because it was legally our car title. I've mailed it, so I should be free of any legal entanglements with the car. What a contrast to the last time I dealt with a wrecked car! I also confirmed that poor Ex has arthritis in her hands that's severe enough that she sometimes has trouble with one of her front door locks.

And she had a suggestion for e-commerce that I'm taking seriously: selling my sex toys on Etsy! I've seen BDSM toys for sale on Etsy, and their infrastructure is pretty solid, so why not? People who regularly sell stuff, and I'm pretty sure a few of are reading this, is there anything wrong with this plan? Yes, Etsy takes their percentage, but so would any other e-commerce sollution. The worst thing I can think of is that people won't take it seriously. However I'm already a trans woman apparently selling to mainly trans people who are familiar with the issue I'm trying to address. I doubt my putative customers, or even the sex therapists who want to help them, would give a damn.

I took my last remaining copy of the toy to the Merc, and you bet your sweet booty I pimped it to total or at least partial strangers. I didn't get any takers, but I did try. I still have one social network left to blast, and a sex therapist or two to buttonhole.

[The following is a copy of the post that I've put on Mastodon and Zuckerber's data mine.]

ATTN: trans women who've had GCS (SRS, etc.), and any other people who have a clitoris whose sensitivity is less than typical. Sex therapists might want to take a look as well, since they may have such people as clients.

Have I got a sex toy for you! Well, I think I do. I have four copies of my latest design, pictured here, and I'd like to give them out on a first-come first-served basis to anyone who'd like to try it, tell me if how well it works for them, and suggest improvements.

(Cisgender women are welcome to try it, but if your clitoris is typically sensitive, this toy is probably not for you. Also, I can have more toys made, but they'll take a few weeks to arrive.)

What do you get out of it, besides hopefully an orgasm or two? The production version of this sex toy when it's available. I figure you'll have earned it.

How does it work?

1. Lube up the narrow end and the nearest flat area.
2. The narrow end goes into the vagina.
3. The flat part goes up against the clit.
4. Party!

Why no motor? Because any motor that could deliver the frequency and amplitude that I personally need would raise safety concerns. And that's to say nothing of the expense and complexity of manufacture, and the likely inconvenience of plugging a bulky motor into a wall.

What's it made of? All prototypes of this particular design are made of 3-D printed nylon 12 with vapor smoothing. I intend to switch to polyurethane for volume manufacturing since that's what dilators are made of. Both materials are used in medical devices, but for maximum safety, I recommend a condom.

How to clean it? Soap and water. These aren't dishwasher-safe.

So, please drop me a line however you see fit, and I'll get you your toy. If you're in Seattle, I can do local delivery. Enjoy!

Patent pending.

I almost forgot to show Zelda III, my latest sex toy prototype, to the Tickler. They have reviewed her esthetics and given her their approval. On to market research!

I've ordered four (4) more copies of Zelda III from the fabrication shop so I'll have a few on hand and ready to deliver if I can find any takers.