sistawendy: me in a Gorey vamp costume looking up (skeptic coy Gorey tilted down)
I had dinner over at Ex's place so we could talk about the Wendling, etc. There's some good news and some bad news.

The good news is that the people she knows of who could help file an SSDI claim for our son don't ask for up front money, they want a percentage afterward. She claims that it won't take multiple years, but given what I've read right here on the Dee Dubya, I'm skeptical. Well, I no longer see a reason to try to stop her, so why not?

There's more good news: my son has started talking to a mentor, another autistic who has, like, a real job and stuff. M'boy is willing to talk to him, apparently, because he doesn't see him as "inferior" (!) the way he did the other autistics he's met over the years. The Wendling has been doing things like arranging therapy appointments and buying groceries without being asked to do so, much less reminded. Ex says he's even discussed coping strategies with his mentor. Maybe there's hope for him after all.

Now here's the bad news: if you'll recall, my divorce decree specifies five years of maintenance at $48K per annum, and we were to split the difference of my 401(k) and the proceeds from the house in Kirkland. We'd originally thought that was going to work in my favor, but neau, it worked in hers. She wants it tacked onto the end of the maintenance, meaning I'll be paying her until early 2022. The darkly funny part of this is that [personal profile] cupcake_goth and I were just talking about this last week. Speak of the devil. Ah well, at least I'm slightly more than halfway done.

I did the 50 to the train to the E line home, just barely making the train an the E. For the first time ever I made contact with a train door. It seems like a metaphor today.

Date: 2019-03-21 11:35 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] basefinder
basefinder: (Default)
That is good to hear for the Wendling.

The bad news... ouch, but at least your halfway. My divorce was going to be a 50-50 thing (both of us employed, both retired military, no kids) but she got much more of the savings and much less of the debt. Still worth it.

Date: 2019-03-21 01:01 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] ximinez
ximinez: (Default)
I'm not quite sure what you mean about "she wants it tacked onto the end of the maintenance", but if your final judgement specifies how that's to be paid, she doesn't get to change that arbitrarily, and if it doesn't, you have just as much right to choose how it's paid out as she does. If, e.g., a lump sum works to your advantage, you're allowed to choose to
pay the lump sum.

Date: 2019-03-21 01:54 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] ximinez
ximinez: (Default)
I think I understand. Thanks. And if it works out, woot!

Date: 2019-03-22 04:11 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] audrey_eee
audrey_eee: Selfie wearing a mask, on a bus (Default)
I think SSDI management organizations are regulated at the state level, and there’s a set percentage that they’re allowed to take as a fee. It should be possible to switch to at least another service provider later. I don’t think anyone can promise to shorten the time for an SSDI filing, but maybe they have a good success rate on the first try? Most people have to appeal.

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sistawendy: a head shot of me smiling, taken in front of Canlis for a 2021 KUOW article (Default)
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