I spent part of last night at the Mercury talking with another MTF transsexual about the sex lives of MTFs. Basically, she said, if you're interested in women and you're pre-op, you're screwed out of luck unless you're attracted to other transsexuals. This wasn't news to me; it matches my own observations and really, as unpleasant as that is for us pre-ops, it makes perfect sense. If lesbians were OK with even a dysfunctional natural penis, they wouldn't quite be lesbians.
Bottom line: presentation matters with everyone. I gotta do what I gotta do to get the Grand Snip and otherwise look female, and that doesn't bother me one bit. What's cruel is that the large majority of MTFs don't have the same advantages I do.
Oh, and I'm sorry to say that even some transsexuals tell canards about bisexuals. I guess you and we get to fight it out for next-to-last in the hierarchy of queerdom, and heaven help anyone who's a member of both groups.
Speaking of presentation, I spent four hours today in Tacoma getting zappy. I even had lunch with Ms. Zappy in the middle of it. A week from today we're doing a six-hour session. Basicaly, I'm doing this to cut down on time & money spent going to Tacoma, plus Ms. Zappy's prices are going up next year.
PTA excitement continues for "conference week" (parents taking over the school during parent-teacher conferences). Before you tell me I'm out of my cotton pickin' mind, let me point out a few things:
From the Dept. of Heh: my landlord is a drummer in a jazz band. In the garage, to which I have no key, he has a soundproofed practice room with two drum kits that he rents out. Surely some of you can use that information.
(How do I know this if I have no key? I borrowed housemate M2's. I was looking for pliers.)
Bottom line: presentation matters with everyone. I gotta do what I gotta do to get the Grand Snip and otherwise look female, and that doesn't bother me one bit. What's cruel is that the large majority of MTFs don't have the same advantages I do.
Oh, and I'm sorry to say that even some transsexuals tell canards about bisexuals. I guess you and we get to fight it out for next-to-last in the hierarchy of queerdom, and heaven help anyone who's a member of both groups.
Speaking of presentation, I spent four hours today in Tacoma getting zappy. I even had lunch with Ms. Zappy in the middle of it. A week from today we're doing a six-hour session. Basicaly, I'm doing this to cut down on time & money spent going to Tacoma, plus Ms. Zappy's prices are going up next year.
PTA excitement continues for "conference week" (parents taking over the school during parent-teacher conferences). Before you tell me I'm out of my cotton pickin' mind, let me point out a few things:
- Nibs & I are collectively required to put in thirty hours of time with the PTA.
- Nibs didn't contribute much last year, and between her health and her recent success in finding work I don't expect her to contribute much this year either.
- No one else stepped forward, and time is of the essence. I was a footsoldier for conference week last year, so I was the best freak for the job.
- I'm also the best freak for the job because they need someone who can drive a computer to automate scheduling: there are multiple activities going on the whole time. Students pick the ones they want on a first come-first served basis, and it's up to us to prevent conflicts and keep the activities within capacity.
From the Dept. of Heh: my landlord is a drummer in a jazz band. In the garage, to which I have no key, he has a soundproofed practice room with two drum kits that he rents out. Surely some of you can use that information.
(How do I know this if I have no key? I borrowed housemate M2's. I was looking for pliers.)
Drunk with freedom!
Sep. 14th, 2010 10:38 amNow that I've got my little room furnished, it's occurred to me that I have 160 square feet of MINE! I've already ordered a copy of Michael Parkes's "Night Flight". Yes, I'm checking out local artists, and yes, it occurred to me that I could make a thing or two. Limitless cosmic power! In a living space that's actually quite adequate.
PSA courtesy of![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
tithonium: If you live in the city of Seattle (not 425-land like me), you can dispose of used sharps in plastic soda bottles for free by taking them to transfer stations. There is a limit (Two, right?) on the number of bottles you can take per trip.
PSA courtesy of
tithonium: If you live in the city of Seattle (not 425-land like me), you can dispose of used sharps in plastic soda bottles for free by taking them to transfer stations. There is a limit (Two, right?) on the number of bottles you can take per trip.
I'm unpacked, or as unpacked as I'm going to get - and 13 out of 15 crates isn't bad, really - without a bookcase and more skirt hangers. To quote foxipher, I have a black skirt problem. And despite not even being full time yet, I have too many shoes and bags.
Speaking of all those clothes, I'm going to want to run some outfits by one or more of you before I wear them to work. There will be your choice of eats, drinks, or sexual favors as an inducement.
I just barely fit enough in. The hardest part was the food. Whether out of maternal reflex or affection (She got me nice tea!), Nibs bought me quite a bit of grub; since it took me so long to move, I have more than one of some items. I only have a small, fragmented fraction of the total cabinet space for my grup, but at least it's all stowed.
Made phake pho with powdered bonito stock & tofu. Not bad, but I should have put the tofu in earlier & made a smaller batch. Rice noodles appear to start disintegrating shortly after cooking, so I was afraid to leave it in the fridge.
Ate dinner with one of my housemates, M2, who has something major in common with me: he too comes from everybody's favorite Koran-burning town in the South. We commiserated about the news. He went to the same high school as I did, only fourteen years later. (Three of the four of us have first names starting with M. Alphabetically, I am M1.) Thanks to another housemate, J, for supplying me with magic Wi-Fi pixie dust.
My New Years-and-maybe-company-holiday-party dress arrived today, and it fits beautifully except though the waist. Fortunately, one of the joys of being in my own place is that I can waist train. For the first time in over sixteen years, I'm wearing a corset to bed.
foxipher, I have a black skirt problem. And despite not even being full time yet, I have too many shoes and bags.Speaking of all those clothes, I'm going to want to run some outfits by one or more of you before I wear them to work. There will be your choice of eats, drinks, or sexual favors as an inducement.
I just barely fit enough in. The hardest part was the food. Whether out of maternal reflex or affection (She got me nice tea!), Nibs bought me quite a bit of grub; since it took me so long to move, I have more than one of some items. I only have a small, fragmented fraction of the total cabinet space for my grup, but at least it's all stowed.
Made phake pho with powdered bonito stock & tofu. Not bad, but I should have put the tofu in earlier & made a smaller batch. Rice noodles appear to start disintegrating shortly after cooking, so I was afraid to leave it in the fridge.
Ate dinner with one of my housemates, M2, who has something major in common with me: he too comes from everybody's favorite Koran-burning town in the South. We commiserated about the news. He went to the same high school as I did, only fourteen years later. (Three of the four of us have first names starting with M. Alphabetically, I am M1.) Thanks to another housemate, J, for supplying me with magic Wi-Fi pixie dust.
My New Years-and-maybe-company-holiday-party dress arrived today, and it fits beautifully except though the waist. Fortunately, one of the joys of being in my own place is that I can waist train. For the first time in over sixteen years, I'm wearing a corset to bed.
L'Shanah Tovah!
Sep. 9th, 2010 11:14 amATTENTION FOLKS WHO HAVE OFFERED ME HOUSEWARES: It turns out that the new place is full of shared glasses, dishes, and pots & pans. I'm pretty sure I'm good because I'm not much of a chef (yet). I was surprised and touched by the offers, though. Thank you.
Tonight's projects: unpacking - thank Bob there's an empty linen closet next to my room - and making heavily modified pho.
Went to Erev Rosh Hashanah services last night with Nibs, boy, and Nibsdad as usual, except no boy suit this time. That isn't just a psychological relief. My boy suits are either pilly or don't fit me through the butt; skipping the suit was her idea. I'm also not going to Rosh Hashanah day this year, but I'll be there for Erev Yom Kippur. I have no idea if my son will want me there next year.
And speaking of Nibs, Dr. Shrink is telling me I haven't nailed down the boundaries as well as I need to. Nibs & m'boy will need a few months to adjust, natch, but there needs to be a clearer deliniation of when I'll be at the Abbey and why.
You see, not only am I new to this separation thing. My parents were married until death did them part. One of my sisters has been through a big move-out breakup, but marriage & kids weren't involved, thankfully.
Annual pimping: The Decibel Festival, is a solid weekend of electronic music all over town the24th 22nd through the 26th. See you Saturday 9/25 at Sole Repair.
Tonight's projects: unpacking - thank Bob there's an empty linen closet next to my room - and making heavily modified pho.
Went to Erev Rosh Hashanah services last night with Nibs, boy, and Nibsdad as usual, except no boy suit this time. That isn't just a psychological relief. My boy suits are either pilly or don't fit me through the butt; skipping the suit was her idea. I'm also not going to Rosh Hashanah day this year, but I'll be there for Erev Yom Kippur. I have no idea if my son will want me there next year.
And speaking of Nibs, Dr. Shrink is telling me I haven't nailed down the boundaries as well as I need to. Nibs & m'boy will need a few months to adjust, natch, but there needs to be a clearer deliniation of when I'll be at the Abbey and why.
You see, not only am I new to this separation thing. My parents were married until death did them part. One of my sisters has been through a big move-out breakup, but marriage & kids weren't involved, thankfully.
Annual pimping: The Decibel Festival, is a solid weekend of electronic music all over town the
I have moved out.
Sep. 7th, 2010 12:11 amI'm typing at you on my phone in bed at the new place. I'm surrounded by 15 packed crates and a nearly full closet. Dear Bob, I've got a lot of stuff. Living in one place for 10 years will do that, I guess.
M'boy's been freaked out about it, acting up earlier today and insisting that he & I play cards tonight. Of course he doesn't admit it has anything to do with the move: he's a 13-year-old aspie. I'll be at the Abbey tomorrow night to help unfreak him.
I'm sure I'll be elated after I get some sleep.
And speaking of the cause of my want of sleep, Bigpuppy, while tearing around the bedroom this morning as usual, drew blood from me with her claws while jumping on the bed. If I turn into a werepuppy, you know why.
M'boy's been freaked out about it, acting up earlier today and insisting that he & I play cards tonight. Of course he doesn't admit it has anything to do with the move: he's a 13-year-old aspie. I'll be at the Abbey tomorrow night to help unfreak him.
I'm sure I'll be elated after I get some sleep.
And speaking of the cause of my want of sleep, Bigpuppy, while tearing around the bedroom this morning as usual, drew blood from me with her claws while jumping on the bed. If I turn into a werepuppy, you know why.
Almost there.
Sep. 4th, 2010 10:54 pmdianala drove her van over to the Abbey, helped me wrestle my high boy and most of its contents down the stairs, and moved it into the new place. Being an IKEA piece it did suffer a little along the way, but we made sure we could open & close one drawer before we left the new place. (What to call the new place? The Abbey Annex? Lhasa because it's near Shangri La?)That's all the furniture, and at least 80% of the small stuff. I should be done by Monday night. I might need to unpack a little just to get some empty crates back. Ten years without a move let me accumulate stuff. This will be quite a sokoban puzzle.
Back in our school days I used to help
dianala move with some regularity. Since then, we've been leading our married and parental lives just a few miles - formerly a few blocks! - away from each other and seeing each other with pitiful infrequency. In that respect, today was the welcome return of happy days.Speaking of happy things, I turned
bork onto the Night Kitchen last night. I'd feel guilty about that, as if I'd gotten her hooked on junk, if the mac & blue cheese hadn't been so delicious.I'm about to make Nibs very happy by moving costumes and everyday girl clothes, thereby giving her the closet space that she's been complaining about for years.
Also, I had a brief chat with the Wendling about the mechanics of transition. My boobs are growing, and they're growing because of the hormones. The surgery isn't for my voice or my boobs; it's for turning boy bits into girl bits. I guess if you've known that stuff for over twenty years, longer than I've known how to program in C, you forget that it isn't obvious to everyone.
Also, I had a brief chat with the Wendling about the mechanics of transition. My boobs are growing, and they're growing because of the hormones. The surgery isn't for my voice or my boobs; it's for turning boy bits into girl bits. I guess if you've known that stuff for over twenty years, longer than I've known how to program in C, you forget that it isn't obvious to everyone.
-
- Erasure, "Oh L'Amour". Damn you,
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
entelein!
A word about dates: Nibs has asked me not to finish moving until after school starts. (So much for motivating myself to finish by Saturday night by moving my club clothes.) The day after school starts just happens to be my fifteenth wedding anniversary. And my chosen Full Time date, December 13th? Despite being chosen for practical reasons, that just happens to be the seventeenth anniversary of when Nibs & I met.
Oof. I sure know how to pick 'em.
Nibsmother has apologized to Nibs for her earlier behavior, none of which I actually saw. I feel better about her now.
Nibstepmother thought I was going to show up to the Mariners game on Monday en femme. She didn't manage to read everything Nibs wrote. Heh.
How I know I'm a Real Woman®: I'm starting to hate bras.
Doc says my estrogen levels are over 1200. (I assume the units are pg/ml.) He isn't worried about it, but that's apparently several times higher than the typical monthly peak for women with working ovaries. No wonder I feel so good.
He is, however, worried about my potassium level. Solution? More fluids. No kidding: I've learned that the occasional dizziness and tingly leg cramps mean "Drink now!" Thanks, spiro!
Oof. I sure know how to pick 'em.
Nibsmother has apologized to Nibs for her earlier behavior, none of which I actually saw. I feel better about her now.
Nibstepmother thought I was going to show up to the Mariners game on Monday en femme. She didn't manage to read everything Nibs wrote. Heh.
How I know I'm a Real Woman®: I'm starting to hate bras.
Doc says my estrogen levels are over 1200. (I assume the units are pg/ml.) He isn't worried about it, but that's apparently several times higher than the typical monthly peak for women with working ovaries. No wonder I feel so good.
He is, however, worried about my potassium level. Solution? More fluids. No kidding: I've learned that the occasional dizziness and tingly leg cramps mean "Drink now!" Thanks, spiro!
the yin and yang of moving stuff
Aug. 23rd, 2010 11:45 pmSo when you move, especially under circumstances like mine, people offer you stuff you may or may not need. And sometimes they put it in your garage without asking.
M&M, my otherwise really cool neighbors, did so with a fairly nice-looking floor lamp. 'OK,' I thought, 'I'll take it anyway.' It had (Foreshadowing!) a dimmer switch; putting a CFL in it made it hum. 'I'm still taking it,' I thought. When I almost misseddianala's driveway in the dark on a quest for more stuff, I braked hard and sent the lamp sliding forward, thereby breaking it. It's now in the Abbey trash.
But on a much more positive note,dianala up and gave me a night stand, which I needed, and a working serger, which is something I've coveted for years. Even if it's going to have to stay at the Abbey due to space constraints, that's a fantastic score. She also ended my box shortage, with eighteen (18) plastic crates, which was all I could fit in the Sanctimobile. I do believe I'm set to pack & go. I have the moving list, a mere 128 items long.
M&M, my otherwise really cool neighbors, did so with a fairly nice-looking floor lamp. 'OK,' I thought, 'I'll take it anyway.' It had (Foreshadowing!) a dimmer switch; putting a CFL in it made it hum. 'I'm still taking it,' I thought. When I almost missed
dianala's driveway in the dark on a quest for more stuff, I braked hard and sent the lamp sliding forward, thereby breaking it. It's now in the Abbey trash.But on a much more positive note,
dianala up and gave me a night stand, which I needed, and a working serger, which is something I've coveted for years. Even if it's going to have to stay at the Abbey due to space constraints, that's a fantastic score. She also ended my box shortage, with eighteen (18) plastic crates, which was all I could fit in the Sanctimobile. I do believe I'm set to pack & go. I have the moving list, a mere 128 items long.
furniture flying down the freeways
Aug. 19th, 2010 11:26 pmNibs the medical reporter told me yesterday I shouldn't exert myself too much while on cipro because it does bad things to your connective tissues. Hahahahaha. I just bought and moved a queen-size futon & frame. I bummed dianala's van and bopped down to the very fringes of Kent. (UK people, amuse yourselves by mapping Kent, WA.) I'd offer to hide bodies for dianala, but she's already got a better vehicle for moving bodies than I do. I guess I'd just have to work the shovel.
The seller, a fellow named Wolfgang (!) found via Craigslist, and his son were very helpful in removing seats, and packing the futon in so I could close the back. His manner & appearance screamed "military", but he mentioned having an injured arm & no health insurance. I'm wearing my Obama t-shirt. I thought it best not to engage in political chit chat, though, especially since reflected in a window I saw my bra peeking out from under my collar.
Met two more housemates, who helped me get my futon into the bedroom. They all know, and none of them seem like transphobic psycho killers. It's kind of funny, to somebody else maybe, that I don't have time to move another stick until Nibsmother leaves. At least I have my list ready.
dianala's van and bopped down to the very fringes of Kent. (UK people, amuse yourselves by mapping Kent, WA.) I'd offer to hide bodies for dianala, but she's already got a better vehicle for moving bodies than I do. I guess I'd just have to work the shovel.The seller, a fellow named Wolfgang (!) found via Craigslist, and his son were very helpful in removing seats, and packing the futon in so I could close the back. His manner & appearance screamed "military", but he mentioned having an injured arm & no health insurance. I'm wearing my Obama t-shirt. I thought it best not to engage in political chit chat, though, especially since reflected in a window I saw my bra peeking out from under my collar.
Met two more housemates, who helped me get my futon into the bedroom. They all know, and none of them seem like transphobic psycho killers. It's kind of funny, to somebody else maybe, that I don't have time to move another stick until Nibsmother leaves. At least I have my list ready.
in-laws in person
Aug. 16th, 2010 12:12 pmNibsmother has decided to fly up this weekend to be with her daughter & grandson. She was asking Nibs if we were divorcing (No, we can't afford to yet.) and what Nibs is going to do for health insurance. (The same thing she's been doing since I joined MyCo.) I thought Nibs had made that clear to her. I'm hoping the in-person visit is as nice as the phone call was.
Oh by the way, bye bye Saturday night plans. Wait a minute! That's my excuse to do Re-bar Sunday night. OK, this works out after all.
I'm about to find out what it's like to take a Sound Transit bus to Tacoma for zappy: one car plus schedule conflict with puppy class equals long damn bus trip.
I have my list of what I want to move, buy, & leave. I just have to poke Nibs into signing off on it, and then I start moving stuff. Stay tuned for the bumming of vans and stuff.
Oh by the way, bye bye Saturday night plans. Wait a minute! That's my excuse to do Re-bar Sunday night. OK, this works out after all.
I'm about to find out what it's like to take a Sound Transit bus to Tacoma for zappy: one car plus schedule conflict with puppy class equals long damn bus trip.
I have my list of what I want to move, buy, & leave. I just have to poke Nibs into signing off on it, and then I start moving stuff. Stay tuned for the bumming of vans and stuff.
I can has place!
Aug. 14th, 2010 04:56 pmI've just put down a deposit and picked up a key for a room in a house. This is the one really close to work that I mentioned earlier. It has a desk, a space heater, and the all-important full-length mirror, but I'm swapping out the twin bed for a queen. I need to make a list of what all I need and indeed can fit, and what I already have.
There seems to be a whole lot of utensils, spices, small electrics, etc. I'm going to have to find out who owns what and what goes where.
It seems to have enough closet space for me. We'll see. Gosh, I hope that rack is sturdy enough to hold my costumes.
No car of my own until January, but I can get to the Abbey by bus or bike in 15 minutes and take the car if I need it for a translacunian trip.
Dude. I can commute on foot in a reasonable time. On a bike? Five minutes or less.
Address available upon request, natch.
Got a call from the dev lead of another team while I was out grocery shopping. He's in a jam, natch, or he wouldn't be calling me on a weekend. I want to help him out, but my office is in the middle of being moved. It's not ready as of an hour ago, and I couldn't connect to my machines as of ten minutes ago, and I've got nowhere else to connect to. Splendid timing.
There seems to be a whole lot of utensils, spices, small electrics, etc. I'm going to have to find out who owns what and what goes where.
It seems to have enough closet space for me. We'll see. Gosh, I hope that rack is sturdy enough to hold my costumes.
No car of my own until January, but I can get to the Abbey by bus or bike in 15 minutes and take the car if I need it for a translacunian trip.
Dude. I can commute on foot in a reasonable time. On a bike? Five minutes or less.
Address available upon request, natch.
Got a call from the dev lead of another team while I was out grocery shopping. He's in a jam, natch, or he wouldn't be calling me on a weekend. I want to help him out, but my office is in the middle of being moved. It's not ready as of an hour ago, and I couldn't connect to my machines as of ten minutes ago, and I've got nowhere else to connect to. Splendid timing.
I can has place?
Aug. 1st, 2010 03:38 pmA while back I talked to the landlord & one resident about renting a room in a house seven blocks from where I work. It's also on the bus route to the Abbey, reasonably priced, with broadband, and clean. (Yeah, maybe a bit dull, but these days I know how to find excitement elsewhere.)
The sticking point was my 9/1 move date. He tried to find somebody for August only but didn't, and Nibs changed her mind in favor of an earlier move date, namely 8/15, even with pro-rated rent. So we have a verbal agreement! We'll nail down the legalities after the landlord gets back from vacation on 8/8.
On a related note, I (barely) helpeddianala & smeehrrr move stuff out of their storage space, and got showered with promises of good stuff I want or need that they don't. Imagine worshipful hand motions here.
Their youngest is what, three years old? He's much more verbal & interactive than I remember m'boy being at that age. Watchingsmeehrrr enjoying his son so much, I got the nagging sense that I suck. One thing's for sure: coming out to my son is going to concentrate my mind on not sucking.
The results of yesterday's poll? A majority of women, but not an overwhelming one, carries one cinder block with two hands. The ones who carry one in each tend to be tall. Yeah, duh maybe, but again news to me. And it's a relief to hear that carrying one in each hand won't get me any grief.
The sticking point was my 9/1 move date. He tried to find somebody for August only but didn't, and Nibs changed her mind in favor of an earlier move date, namely 8/15, even with pro-rated rent. So we have a verbal agreement! We'll nail down the legalities after the landlord gets back from vacation on 8/8.
On a related note, I (barely) helped
dianala & smeehrrr move stuff out of their storage space, and got showered with promises of good stuff I want or need that they don't. Imagine worshipful hand motions here.Their youngest is what, three years old? He's much more verbal & interactive than I remember m'boy being at that age. Watching
smeehrrr enjoying his son so much, I got the nagging sense that I suck. One thing's for sure: coming out to my son is going to concentrate my mind on not sucking.The results of yesterday's poll? A majority of women, but not an overwhelming one, carries one cinder block with two hands. The ones who carry one in each tend to be tall. Yeah, duh maybe, but again news to me. And it's a relief to hear that carrying one in each hand won't get me any grief.
I seem to be unusual in looking for a room in a house more than a month in advance. I just had a lovely house six blocks from work tell me the only way I could have the room is if I paid for it through August. I'm not crazy about not knowing where I'm living six weeks from now.
And from the Dept. of Dubious Fun, I got to out myself to total strangers whom I may never see or hear from again.
Strategized with Dr. Shrink today about how to tell my boy. Dr. Shrink says he can see the boobs a-growin'. Yay, yes, but I think I need some more really tight sports bras now.
Called m'boy's shrink all mysterious like and told him Nibs & I want to meet with him Saturday even though m'boy is in camp now. I often wonder if these guys welcome the challenge, or what.
And from the Dept. of Dubious Fun, I got to out myself to total strangers whom I may never see or hear from again.
Strategized with Dr. Shrink today about how to tell my boy. Dr. Shrink says he can see the boobs a-growin'. Yay, yes, but I think I need some more really tight sports bras now.
Called m'boy's shrink all mysterious like and told him Nibs & I want to meet with him Saturday even though m'boy is in camp now. I often wonder if these guys welcome the challenge, or what.
I just answered six Craigslist ads for rooms for rent in houses. There was a surprising density of them in my neighborhood. Nibs wants me nearby, i.e. not too far from my current commute path.
The transpo situation is still unsettled. We both want a second car in the next few months, but in the meantime I've been looking for places near bus routes to work. Praise MyCo and their wonderful bus passes.
Money-wise, assuming I land one of these rooms and Nibs' recent progress in finding work continues, I thinkI'll we'll be OK. (Read: I can still get out on weekends.)
I still don't feel quite comfortable responding to female-only ads. Luckily, none of them have been in the right locations.
I'm about to find out how much the idea of living with a transsexual freaks people out. I'll be bringing one of my treasured name change certificates so I can tell them, "No, really" without having to take off my shirt.
The transpo situation is still unsettled. We both want a second car in the next few months, but in the meantime I've been looking for places near bus routes to work. Praise MyCo and their wonderful bus passes.
Money-wise, assuming I land one of these rooms and Nibs' recent progress in finding work continues, I think
I still don't feel quite comfortable responding to female-only ads. Luckily, none of them have been in the right locations.
I'm about to find out how much the idea of living with a transsexual freaks people out. I'll be bringing one of my treasured name change certificates so I can tell them, "No, really" without having to take off my shirt.
